It was a truly trying year of trying to find my place outside of school, in my home and in this universe.

Never has an turn of age meant so much or brought so much changes. 

In the year of 2014, I struggled and resisted, gave in and conceded only to fall deeper into resentment.
I fought/lied/lugged/served, was bullied/fired/cheated/disappointed/despised/hid, felt absolutely lonely and lost.
Getting let go at a job you tried hard to understand and do well in was a major setback.
I'm not the kind of person people fire, I told myself.
I struggled with my self esteem, played down my self worth and blamed myself for every setback,
living a deep dark month of weeping, worrying and sleepless nights.
There were strange eureka moments in that month that now, on hindsight, were really desperate. 

But like everything else, 2014 had it's moments.
I graduated, travelled, hiked, biked, picnic-ed, received surprises, threw surprises,
did a real styling gig, exhibited and also started Of Trying Times.
Above all, I was loved despite everything. 

The best moments in 2014 seems to be the ones that came full circle,
like the styling gig that I did as a stylist with the same team that I assisted 3 years back.
Finally having 30 Minutes Breather exhibited and being a proper vendor at a market with
people that I met 2 years back when I was just an intern.
It is realisations like these that acts as an affirmation for me to keep going despite the difficult moments,
knowing that some day these experiences will come full circle too. 

In the coming year, I'll be 21 year-old adult with a seemingly doomed relationship,
no plans of getting a job or applying for university - basically a failure by society standards.
I can't say I'm ready for the 'advices' and questions that will be thrown my way but I think I'll be okay.

Love,
pixie

Things truly have a strange way of coming together.

A little more than 2 months back, I was feeling quite upset about not finding the right job.

In fact, I was just really depressed and anxious about how things have been really stale and bad.

So after spending the first month moping around,

I started working harder to find that job.

Opportunities started presenting itself and at one point,

I was to choose between a studio that I have always admired and a studio I wasn't familiar with that could be good for me.

While not having any choices could be depressing, having 2 'just-as-good' choices can be equally nerve wrecking.

Once again, things fell into place and I found myself waiting for work to start.

While I waiting, I meddled with materials I had interest in.

It started with making necklaces for myself and then I began mixing things together.

Before long, I was working on pieces that I doodled on a notebook.

None of these were even meant to be something.

But I guess they did mean something.

A chance, maybe?

A month back, I heard Lush 99.5 talking about The Local People's Market.

Half an hour later, I bought a space for that market.

So then I HAVE to make something. 

I had a name in my head for a while already, one that aptly describes the past year of being 20.

Of trying times. 

And so, using this chance to once again tell a story,
the pieces from the label is my way of sharing my experience and anxiety as a 20 (and soon to be 20 something)

I am currently working on new pieces and everything should be up on the site very soon.

Till then, stay sane.

I first took notice of Teresa when she collaborated with YESAH,
there was something so unique about her drawings! 

It wasn't long before I started paying attention to her works and talking about it with friends. 

Naturally, while discussing about another episode of 30 Minutes Breather, I showed T her work. 

For a long time, we were hesitant about approaching her because this project has always been about 

people who have a hobby apart from their full-time job -
which is why we don't really feature the many talented artist/musicians/designers in Singapore. 

Eventually, we decided that we wouldn't approach her. 

And so t'was begins my journey for self exploration.

and then (maybe) some job-searching.

Your 20s are like walking in the wilderness. 
You have enough idealism for ambition but not enough experience to know right from wrong.

"MAKE OVERALLS"

That note has been sitting on my wall for a month now but yet nothing has been done because I am  employed! (yay?)
 Though the label intern still sticks taut-ly and I find it difficult living a routine, I'm still okay. 

Inspired by the tale Mitch Albom wrote, 'The Timekeeper' Collection explores various wishes for time. 
Our obsession for time never ceases but morphs at a given situation; sometimes it's too little, other times too much. 
It is often measured, divided and rarely forgotten. 

Replacing the sands in a hour glass with coloured beads and circular disc, 
our time is divided and trapped between layers of organza in this pastel-hue collection. 

For Spring 2015, each outfit transforms into a character as Pixie T interprets 
how time affects a family as each member has a different hope for time.

Pages from my sketchbook for The Timekeeper Collection. 

Ahh, finally it's over but I'm not used to a life of idle. 

There's this jar beside my bed with 'Adventure' taped across it.

It was meant for loose change but my allowances went in as well.

Melbourne in June was the plan.

But you don't just seek adventure with a plan, you approach it with spontaneity.

And so, with a little bit of that money, we went hiking in Bali.

We got dressed at 1 that morning with little rest and little knowledge of what lies ahead.

It took 2 hours of a bumpy journey in a stranger's van before we arrived at a dark carpark.

When we got out of the car, we realised it was cold.

Cold?? How could it be cold in Bali??

The guide laughed and handed us a torch and a bottle of water.

Soon, we made our way into the darkness, with our paths lit only where our torch fell.

It was strange, walking into the darkness, not knowing where your feet would land. 

Strangely beautiful to see nothing but a trail of torches behind you, where other trek in the same path.

We were surprised that the trail was easy, nothing but a pebbled pathway.

And of course, the flat ground grew steeper and the pebbles grew into rocks.

Before long, the cardigan became too warm for the 15 degrees weather as I sweat from the climb.

The steps have become so difficult and we found our pauses for break increasingly frequent.

It took 2 hours but we were finally on our last 10 minutes away from the peak.

When we finally reached, we weren't quite sure what to look at.

It was pitch dark after all!

So, we sat on a bench with banana bread and eggs freshly steamed from the volcano.

It was so cold, so cold and I struggled to keep myself warm with a cup of tea.

The boys were armed with cameras, all ready to capture the sunrise.

I had hoped for a magnificent yolk but that didn't hapen. 

Instead, shades of blue emerged and the landscape formed before us.

Beautiful, fucking beautiful.

I can't explain why it takes me ages to write about an event. 

Sometimes, it just seems like stories can't be told well until they have been retold too many times in your head. 

Yes, even until the joke gets too old. 

There is plenty to say about my recent trip to Bali. 

How I almost didn't make it, the way friends gave me full support, scrambling for last minute tickets and the anxiety while I waited for replies and help. 

But that's a long story. 

Here's the short version. 

We made it, 4 people with last minute tickets and little knowledge (and money) for the place we would call home for the next 6 days. 

We arrived, got terribly lost and disappointed by the supposed 700m walk to the beach only to arrive right smack in the middle of the most beautiful sunset we have ever seen.

'Ahh, this is Bali!'

The next few days were spent bumming on the beach over bintangs and teh boloh between sessions of smashing ourselves in the waves. Lepak. I've once told T that I can't just do nothing. I get swallowed by my sense of guilt and I end up cleaning my room or altering something, anything. It must be something about having sand between your toes and salt in your hair that makes you just enjoy bumming. Must be that thing they were talking about in Eat, Pray, Love. (which I recently re-watched and loved.)

The sweetness of doing nothing.

And who can forget the waves, the ones you dodge with hugged knees as it hits your back, tumbling along with the might of the waves. It's only logical to feel frightened but I felt so calm, so safe as if there was no need to think of what lays ahead and be part of that body.

To exist.

It really surprises me that it has been 4 months since the upload of the last 30 Minutes Breather feature. What scares me is that I've yet to share this beautiful feature of Jolene (@Jolenekcw) with you.

Is it just because time has slipped so stealthy past me or have I been too caught up with school?  

I must say, this must be the best one so far and both T and I are very very proud of it. Perhaps that's why it took a while for me to share it with you, I don't know. 

Breakfast. My favourite meal of the day, unfortunately, sometimes I find myself rushing through it, simply putting food inside me so that I could get on with the day. On good days, I make myself pancakes or parfait and it creates this bubbling feeling of joy that keeps me going till I hit the train or bus. So imagine my excitement when Jolene told me that her 30 Minutes Breather was to wake up earlier for this meal. It's absolutely perfect!

We had so much fun putting this together and we hope you like it! 

Love, Pixie